Here Comes the Bride...Oh and There She Goes!

I have often wondered about the significance of marriages and weddings.  There MUST be an answer to this since almost all of my friends are married, so let me ask:

• Why did you all marry each other?

The reason I ask is because divorce rates are steadily climbing which makes me think that the constitution of marriage isn’t what it used to be and perhaps we are all stuck in this Leave it to Beaver fantasy.  Couples stayed together thru hard times back in the I Love Lucy days because society shunned divorce and maybe people held on to their promises more than they do now. 

Divorce rates are increasing every year. In California alone, 75% of marriages end in divorce, which makes me think that “For Better or For Worse” is more a metaphor and less a real promise. I honestly think that that metaphor sets up unrealistic expectations.

Throughout history, people were wed out of obligations:

• Religious traditions
• Bargaining agreements between families
• Political reasons in royalty
• Shotguns

On the majority, those obligations do not apply to 2011.

Don’t get me wrong, I applaud quite a few of my friend's divorces because their marriages were cancerous, but let’s cut to the chase:

• What is the point in getting married when you can just as easily get divorced?

Why not just live together in bliss? I have friends who do that and their relationship has been going strong for 13 years now, they even have a baby together. Isn’t THAT more of a sign of their commitment than a diamond ring and an $800 wedding cake?

People may think that I write these blogs about being single because I want to vent about not being married.  That is pretty far from the truth. I’m just hoping to meet an amazing guy who I won't ever get sick of. Weather we get married or not isn’t the issue for me.

I understand there are legal perks to being married. But you can get hooked up with all that good stuff by eloping or becoming Domestic Partners which is much easier and cheaper.

I honestly think that most people want their 15 minutes of fame, and since that’s pretty difficult to actually achieve, a fantastic wedding that cost’s them half a year’s salary is their pacifier.  Or maybe they just want to live out their wedding day fantasies that they’ve cooked up in their heads since childhood. I dunno! I’m an event planner for a living, and I just don’t see the fascination in planning a huge wedding.

All the stress of:

• Budgeting 
• Location scouting
• Hiring vendors
• Paying for a dress I’ll never wear again and the guilt of asking half a dozen bridesmaids to do the same thing

Then the stress of the actual day:

• Getting up at the crack of dawn to start the process of looking absolutely perfect
• Spending all night talking to every single person 
• Being so totally exhausted, staving and shitfaced that I can’t even imagine doin’ it with my new husband in our luxury honeymoon suite

 None of that sounds appealing to me. NONE of it.


If I ever get married, I’m going to ask my friends to throw the event for me and I’ll just show up on the day and wear whatever they shove in front of my face. I’m not kidding.

I do want to fall madly in love and spend a wonderful life with one special man who I will have children with. I just don’t see the point in the pomp and circumstance.


Enlighten me...